My latest beauty disaster: Going no ‘poo, as in shampoo.

Here at Eating with Ang, I’m about nourishing all parts of ourselves. Today I’m nourishing my hair.

This post is to share my latest beauty-routine disaster. Once I lopped off half my left eyebrow trying to wax them myself. Or there was the time I removed a chunk of the front of my hair when trying a new facial hair remover. How did my hair get stuck in my ‘stache long enough to disconnect from the rest of my hair without me noticing it across my face? Remains a mystery.

I decided to try this no ‘poo thing. Well, no, I didn’t really decide to give up shampoo. I have this bottle of Castille soap that I’ve been using to make laundry detergent, dish soap, and body wash and realized you could use it instead of shampoo.

One google search found that apparently shampoo is evil. It strips our hair of all kinds of things that Pinterest users seem to be very up on. (I know a lot of busy moms who actually make the stuff on there and they have way better party favors, cupcakes, and Valentines bags than I do. It’s my own choice that when I’m not working, parenting, cooking, cleaning, dogging, being a wife–wait, poor Dan–I very rarely make time to be a wife. Anyway, I’m sitting on my ass looking at your cool stuff on Pinterest instead of actually making any of it.) According to the Pinners, shampoo is stripping our hair of natural oils and doing something very mean to our sebaceous glands. I’m not exactly sure what but if you google it you will see how bad it is. It’s probably one of the reasons everyone needs to go gluten-free.

Pinners claim that after a couple weeks of not using shampoo their hair is full, lovely, clean, wavy, and all the things promised in commercials for hair products. I thought not washing hair with shampoo=dreadlocks. Apparently, there is more to dreads than I thought because the pinners pics are of very nice hair and scalps.

I also found out that Italian and Spanish women wash their hair once a week max and, at least, in magazines they ALL have long, flowing, black hair. So it must be true.

While I do make an effort to bring less toxic things in our home, our bodies and our lives, I’m not actually anti-shampoo, but I have this big bottle of Castille soap, so why not use it?

Castille soap is made from organic oils, kind of like a hippie version of Wen. You know from the late-night commercials where all the ladies have long, luscious hair? It only contains oils. You follow it up with apple cider vinegar. Yep, the bottle that you also use for salad dressing. That’s instead of conditioner, which is shampoo’s also-evil cousin. It’s like salad dressing for your hair, which makes naked lettuce leaves and veggies more delectable, so it must do the same for hair.

The first day was fine. My hair felt all soft. But, it’s now day five and it looks like the time a bottle of olive oil accidentally fell on my head. Yes, that “I love Lucy” thing really happened to me. My mom kept the olive oil up really high in a cabinet and the lid was not screwed on tight. I’m so greasy today! But I decided to stick with this for 2 weeks because its almost summer and no ‘poo is supposed to cut the frizz.

I look up solutions on Pinterest. These ladies don’t just throw out advice–they take pictures and post them. It must work, right? “Try shaking some corn starch in your hair.” I flip my head over and shake corn starch on my hair. I look in the mirror and I look like GEORGE WASHINGTON! My hair is all white. I quickly get a brush wet and start to brush the corn starch out of my hair. Do you know what happens to corn starch when you mix it with water? Hint: Corn starch mixed with water is what you use to thicken Thanksgiving gravy. Now my hair is covered with gravy thickener and it’s almost time to leave for school. Thank God I do not have any professional meetings today.

Soph helps me towel out all the white and thick stuff. “You don’t look that bad, Mommy. You’ve looked worse.” Thanks, kiddo.

9 more days til soft, fluffy, Italian-Spanish-like-long-black, completely natural, frizz-free, late-night TV commercial beautiful hair. We shall see…especially if my hair gets long and black in the next week. Or if Dan starts dipping carrots in it because he’s mistaken my hair for salad dressing.

2 thoughts on “My latest beauty disaster: Going no ‘poo, as in shampoo.”

  1. Absolutely fantastic!!
    Smiling and laughing through the whole thing. Can’t wait for the next installment!!!

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